"Who in the World am I?Ah! That's the great puzzle"

Friday, June 27, 2008

The truth about Summer 08'

I hadn't actually prepared a 'TO-DO-LIST' for the summer but the moment i got on the flight from Bangalore, I knew summer 08' was going to be exhilarating.Delhi's one of my favourite places on earth...not that I've been all over but from the ones that I have been to, Delhi makes it to the top 3!

Well then, my summer job at CNN-IBN was the main purpose of the visit, however the sun and the summer spirit doesn't allow you to stick to a routined, monotonous life...so summer crawled around and filled my life with sunshine, even at the darkest hour and Life seemed content.

The drinking sessions with a pack of cards and the meeting of strangers over a glass of wine, vodka etc and then, the aborning of friendships...it happened. it all happened...

The strange and the never-expected love for a pint of beer...Euro 2008...shopping sprees at Sarojini..meeting of old friends at Sikkim House...Clubbing with the once-upon-a-times' cute guy who you actually thought had not noticed you...the better understanding of the Hind language and the new learnt abuses and derogatory slurs.....Love and memories.....awwww....Summer 08'

The details would be appallingly frank if i wrote them down but summer was what it was meant to be...

I only wish I'd prepared a 'TO-DO-LIST'....

These Little Wonders

There are times when you’ve paused from the daily chores and wondered… What if I had…? Some decisions that you might have, have not made. Some people that you might have loved, might not have. Some action that you might have taken, some that you might not have.

Perhaps, things that went half-way through and then you waited for another milestone to occur but you were left mid-way.

Thoughts that remained and fossilized in your head, thoughts that were never turned to words. You wish you had said it out or in the contrary, words that should have stayed thoughts.

The pending issues that never completed. The unfinished business that you never opened the file to. Life has given us all this and more; and may be this is what it is supposed to be.

May be, there was nothing more after the kiss or may be there was so much more before you turned around and walked away.

What if you’d said those words and made a difference or what if you hadn’t said out loud and changed the situation?

These are not the questions that Life throws irrefutably at you. These are the little wonders that Life gives you, perhaps, to know and to grow.

So, when you pause and think about the What ifs… Think about these little wonders. Learn to convert your regrets to acceptance. It’s not easy and as clich├ęd as it may sound, it’s not impossible either. It’s the truth and it’s these little wonders that make you smile and hum, make you laugh in the middle of a sermon when you’re mind is everywhere but the church.

These Little Wonders….they’ll set you free.

Monday, June 23, 2008

The Loss of a Father


Friday morning I was at work, it had seemed like a usual morning, until my mother called and in a panic stricken voice, informed me that my grandfather had passed away...

I had never had a close relationship with the man. His chronicles included a profuse lifestyle, his short lived but notable political career, his Hong Kong visit that nurtured his writing skills and resulted in an Odyssey, that is piled and flipped through often by his grand-children, particularly, me. His old age transformed him into a solitary and slow soul that he began living in a different world which seemed uncomprehending to us.

Over the years, I had never seen my father converse much with him. My father and His father had a strange relationship, one that was built on past misunderstandings and mistakes. Yet, it seemed like my father had accepted the man with all his flaws and most of all, still loved and respected him. It was evident...at least to me.

So, I called up my father this morning and I wasn't sure what to say. "Should I come home?" I asked. "No," my father replied in a tone that I'd never heard before. It was slow, sad and solemn.
I would have never imagined the death of a parent . . .
But this morning I felt it. My father's tone, his unuttered pain, his unimaginable loss made me feel the incurable sting that a child feels when he loses his Father.